{Thank you for purchasing the expanded second edition of The Adventures of Inquisitor Sam the Glowy Handed! You’ve heard all about his battles with ancient darkspawn magisters, vicious barbarian gods, and even the ground itself! But the tale of Uth’Samahl Lavellan didn’t end there. This exciting new chapter of the Inquisitor’s story picks up two years after the end of his exploration of the Deep Roads as new dangers arise to threaten the Inquisition, all of Thedas, and the true hero of our story, the glowy hand! Complete with new and updated Glossary entries to cover the additional people, places and things encountered since the last edition! Read on to see the exciting conclusion of the Inquisitor’s story!}
{You’re going to pay for that “true hero” crack, Varric. Even if I mostly agree with it. -Sam}
After preventing a titan from unwittingly destroying Orzammar, the Inquisition was granted a bit of a reprieve in the form of the relatively peaceful chunk of time that followed. Nearly two years passed by without anything truly significant happening. I mean, yes, there was still inquisiting to be done, but none of the earth-shaking level to which I had become accustomed. My companions all left to live their own lives for a time, since our main goal had been accomplished. What finally pulled us out of that pleasant reverie was something far scarier than vengeful, godhood-aspiring magisters, ancient Dragon-gods, or civilization-threatening earthquakes: Chantry politics. If you’ve been paying attention, you’ll remember that the Chantry as a whole never fully approved of the Inquisition. They had left us alone during the whole Breach event, seeing as how I was the only one who could end that threat, but had never really come around to our side. Well, Divine Victoria, aka Leliana, had held things off for as long as she could, but it was finally time to figure out what part the Inquisition would play in the future of Thedas. So, Cullen, Josephine and I donned the same ridiculous outfits we’d worn to the ball at Halamshiral and made our way to meet the Exalted Council. Which was also in Halamshiral.
Still deeply embarrassing.
Josephine let me know on the ride in what we were up against. Skyhold sat in the Frostback Mountains between Orlais and Ferelden, and those two nations had ideas on what the Inquisition should be. To sum it up, Orlais wanted us under their thumb, and Ferelden wanted us gone. Rude and ungrateful, in equal measure. The first friendly face I saw before proceedings began was Mother Giselle, who had returned to her Chantry duties. She let me know that all of my former companions were in attendance, so I immediately postponed the important business to visit them. I also got even more suspicious at this point, because gathering us all in one place seemed… foreboding, I guess. The first one I ran into was Varric, who had apparently been elected as the Viscount of Kirkwall. Meaning he was in charge of the place. Despite the protestations of an extremely harassed looking seneschal, Varric presented me with a title and a key to the city. A key that controlled one of the enormous chain nets in Kirkwall’s harbor. Which I was definitely going to try at some point. Blackwall, who had gone back to being Thom Rainier, was also there. He had been tracking down members of the company he’d betrayed and attempting to make amends, meaning he had been getting punched a lot. Since his last visit had been in Kirkwall, I assumed he had caught a ride across the Waking Sea with Varric. The Iron Bull and the Chargers were there, Sera invited me to be one of her Red Jennies if the Inquisition went away, and Cole had gotten himself a girlfriend. Josephine took me to the greatest, and most indescribable, performance I’d ever seen, Vivienne treated me to a spa day, and Cullen found himself a dog. How he got a dog before I did will forever baffle and irritate me. Finally, Cassandra was exceedingly, but also adorably, nervous. Apparently, Varric had given her the impression that I was going to propose marriage to her, and she was fretting, to say the least. The fact that, despite her being able to face down a dragon, I can still use the words “nervous” and “fretting” to describe her reactions to social and emotional situations is just another reason I feel the way I do about her. And, no, I didn’t propose right then and there. I have better plans than that.
At least I’d found a change of clothes. Well, a different hue, but still, an improvement and oh, my gods, her armor has little heart-shaped holes in it!
After having caught up with most of my friends, which had to have taken at least a day, it was time to get down to business. First, I found Duke Cyril of Orlais talking to the Inquisition's Tevinter Ambassador. You may have noticed I didn’t mention Dorian in the part about catching up with friends. Well, this is why. He was the Tevinter Ambassador. Next, I found Divine Victoria in conversation with Arl Teagan of Ferelden. My former spymaster let me know that she was still there to help the Inquisition, even though she was now sporting the biggest and best hat in the business.
Magnificent. And not glowing this time.
I was able to catch up with Dorian at this point, who gave me the tragic news that his father was dead, and more than likely not of natural causes. That meant Dorian would be taking his place as a magister and would have to return to the Imperium, more permanently this time, very soon. He did give me a magic sending crystal that would allow us to communicate despite the distance, however. When I finally couldn’t postpone it any longer, the Exalted Council actually began. And it was as inane as you would expect. However, things livened up quickly when a guard pulled me away from the proceedings to meet Leliana. At the corpse of a Qunari soldier. Who had no reason to be in Halamshiral. So, I left Josephine to hold off the diplomats while I got down to some old-fashioned inquisiting. The trail of blood left by the Qunari led me up some garden lattice to a room with an active eluvian inside it. Fortunately, my friends had had the foresight to bring their old adventuring gear along, so we prepared for battle and stepped straight through the mirror.
I hate it when things are randomly floating. Or sitting on giant columns with no visible ground beneath them, close enough.
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